February

I guess I need to update the entire month of February.   Work has really taken off for me.  I have been busier than ever, and I love it!  I really have a great job.  I work with great people!  Molly started a few weeks ago which made it even better.  Ike has also been working NONSTOP!  It’s always easier for me to update in bullets so here we go…

·         I am starting with the not great news.  My dad’s mom and dad were both diagnosed with cancer this month.  My grandpa has kidney cancer.  For his case the good news is they have caught it early enough to treat it with medication, which is wonderful because surgery is not an option since he has a pace maker.  My mamaw has colon cancer.  She will have surgery to remove a portion of her colon, and they believe that is all she will need (no chemo or radiation).  So we are praising the Lord that both appear to have a great outlook.  I hope I could have the same attitude as my mamaw if it were me.  She is so optimistic, and refuses to think anything but that she will be fine!

·          I already mentioned this but…Molly moved here!  This has been such a blessing.  She is helping decorate my house.  She is a terrific decorator, and me, well not so much.  We went to consignment stores last weekend, and it was a blast!  I can’t wait to go again. 

·         Ike and I went to see The Vow, which I had been counting down the days to see.  VERY disappointed, but the company was nice and we had a lot of good snacks.  J

·        Ike went to Eupora for a few weeks, and Buster and I got to go down and stay a few nights.  This was Buster’s first hotel stay.  He was a little distraught over all the noises in the hotel, but it was fun to have him with us.  Since we stalked Ike out of town, we were able to spend Valentine’s Day together.  We went to Abner’s, came back to the hotel and played words with friends together, so romantic! 

·         We were able to celebrate with our great friends the Jones, for our sweet little niece Peyton’s first birthday!  Jenifer had some of the cutest ideas!  Ike and I were so happy to be a part of this!  We love these guys!

It has been another busy and crazy month.  One thing is for sure our life is never dull or boring.   I am doing much better than I was from my previous post.  This journey is a hard one, but I know God has a reason for us to go through it all.  I am so thankful for Ike!  I can never say that enough.  He has been a rock for me over the past year.

What a ride!

Infertility is definitely an emotional roller coaster ride. I remember when I had my surgery in November the doctor said you should be pregnant in 3 months. Sitting there with Ike and counting down that we could have a baby in 2012. I thought by February I would have had 3 full cycles. I've had one, and it was Provera induced. So Thursday we went in to see what is going on. I thought we would go and he would prescribe ovulation meds and we would move right along. Unfortunately that was not what happened. He found a cyst in one of my ovaries that is fairly large. Fabulous! Now we are waiting to see if it goes away on it's own. He seems to believe it will. The thing is we can't start meds to help me ovulate till it is gone. I was SAD and ANGRY.  Realizing the chances of having a baby this year are no longer a reality.  April will make 3 years we have been trying to get pregnant.  It is very hard to understand.  Thursday was awful.  I felt like if I could just move on I could be better, but there is no moving on.  I know that the visit was not terrible like I orginally felt.  I know that ovulation meds are still an option, and that really is a blessing. I am thankful that I have a relationship with the Lord and I know He has perfect timing.  We just have to stay focused on that and continue to pray for His will.

Sleepy head!

The many nappings of the baby!  He is one rotten baby.

He absolutely has to be close to us at all times.

A whole bunch of Randomness

*Mom had her LAST radiation!!  She comes here first week of February for a check up!

*I am still adjusting to "busy" season (I guess Ike is too, ha since he is the one working all the hours :) ).  Ike works A. L.O.T.!  He has been out of town some, and this will probably happen more and more for both of us.  This past week he was suppose to be out of town and something happened and he got to stay home!  You would have thought it was Christmas all over again!  I was super excited!

*My friend from my old job, Molly got a job with me at the state!  I'm happy about this!

*Lately I have been doing better mentally with the whole idea of having a baby.  I feel like I have not been as negative and felt very hopeful.  BUT I have also wanted a baby, maybe more than ever.  I know it seems that it would have made me feel worse, but I think the Lord has used it to help me be excited.  I have also started a plan for reading the bible in a year, and spending that time in the word has no doubt changed my attitude.  I was talking to someone the other day about being in a relationship, and I ask the person," are you were you want to be to be in a relationship?"  This opened my eyes to how much I have put seeking the Lord on the back burner, and focused on all the stuff going on.  I LOVE the Lord, and I believe and have sooo much faith in Him!  For a while now I have not been actively seeking Him though.  I pray and occassionally would read a devotional, but really spending time getting to know Him has not been a priority.  I was convicted of how often I have a few seconds of "free time", and I will pull up my facebook app or pinterest when I could be pulling up the bible.  I started praying that God would give me a desire for His word, and He has!  I find myself getting excited to see what's next!  God has brought me to a good place!

No more Petsmart.

I feel like Buster really is the perfect practice for children!  This dog is a mess!  Ike was out of town last week for work, and I had to go out of town on Thursday night so thankfully my sister's friend agreed to keep Buster for us.  His toenails have been needing to be clipped badly!  Wednesday afternoon I ran him up to Petsmart to have them done.  This is always a challenge.  He absolutely hates it!  The vet in Columbus usually let me hold him and this seemed to calm him down enough for her to clip them.  My sister had suggested that I have his nails grinded instead of clipped because they are so sharp. D.I.S.A.S.T.E.R.  Buster got really upset and tried to bite the lady, and of course it is against policy for me to come back with him.  AND I must say that I have never experienced a person working with animals that seemed to not even like them.  She told me it would be best if I left the room.  I knew this was probably going to upset Buster even more, but she's suppose to be the expert so I left.  I came back, and she had taken Buster to the back room.  She comes out and tells me that they were not able to grind his nails because when they put the mussel on him he started using the bathroom everywhere.  I tried to explain that he was probably nervous, and she proceeds to tell me that animals do that as a way of making you stop what you are doing to get their way.  At this point I am making note to never bring him back here.  I had no idea how bad it was or would have said more to her.  We get to the car, and Buster lays out in the floor.  I thought that was odd, but I went through the drive through to get food.  I tried to give Buster a french fry and he would not budge.  I pick him up and he was completely limp.  He would not even look at me, it was so scary.  I call Petsmart, and they say some dogs go into shock.  WHAT??!!  A few minutes later Buster throws up everywhere!  Once we got home he was fine!  It was the weirdest thing in the world!  Needless to say that was our last trip there!   

We also had a visitor this weekend...

We enjoyed hanging out with Sam!  

Great news!

We got some FABULOUS news today!  My mom went in to have her internal radiation done.  The doctor said she did great.  He did an examination while she was asleep and there were no signs of the masses that were there before!!  She will have 2 more next week as a precaution, and she will have an operation for some of the side effects of the operation.  My aunt called to tell me this and I just started bawling (southern word for crying a lot)!  I have tried REALLY hard not to cry a lot during all of this, and I think it all that just came flooding out.  It was so good to hear my daddy sound like a new person!  The poor thing has been so stressed.  He has done an amazing job taking care of mom, but I know that he has been having a really hard time.  This whole thing has given me even more respect for my daddy!  I am just amazed at God!  His power & His faithfulness!  Thank you all for all your prayers we know this is a miracle!!!

My cousin sent this to me yesterday, she took this about a week before we found out mom had cancer.

Happy 2012!

Happy things from 2011
* Ike finished his Master's degree!
* Both got jobs in Jackson
* Went on a cruise for our 3rd Anniversary! 
* Found a house to rent and we leased our house
* Figured out why we lost 2 babies (and had surgery to hopefully fix it)

2011 has sure been a roller coaster ride for us.  There have been a lot of ups and downs.  I thought of making a not so happy list but decided instead to stick with just the happy list of the blessings from the Lord.  The devil did a good job of attacking me over the Christmas break.  I have to admit there were moments I let him win.  BUT my God is big and always overcomes, and He gave me a husband to keep me in check.  Ike refuses to let me have a pity party no matter how hard I try, and even though in those moments that makes me angry I am very thankful.
So into 2012...I am praying that God will help me to give it all to Him.  He has proven over and over again that He will make a way I need only to trust Him.
Here are a few things I'm hoping and PRAYING 2012 will bring..
*My mom to be cancer free
*A church home for Ike and I
*Godly friends here
*Maybe a baby or two or three into our family... (not necessarily for Ike and I to parent all of these)

I do need to report that my mom did get some good news last week.  She went in for a MRI, and the doctor said he was pleased with her progress.  She will begin the internal radiation soon.  He said she should have 5 of those which she will get in Columbus.  She is glad to be able to be home with my dad.